Motivational Interviewing

Part of you wants change and part of you does not. That is normal, and it is where we start.

Motivational Interviewing is a collaborative, respectful way of helping people resolve mixed feelings about change. Rather than arguing for change, I help you hear your own reasons and decide what you are ready to do.

On This Page

My Approach

What Motivational Interviewing is

Motivational Interviewing, often called MI, grew out of work with people considering changes to alcohol and substance use. It has since been used for many kinds of change, including health habits, smoking, work decisions and relationship patterns.

Its starting point is ambivalence: the experience of wanting something and not wanting it at the same time. You might want to drink less and also value how a drink helps you unwind. You might want to leave a job and also fear what comes next. Ambivalence is not a flaw. It is a normal part of considering any meaningful change.

MI treats you as the expert on your own life. My role is to help you explore both sides honestly, strengthen the reasons that matter most to you and support the decisions you make.

Collaborative
Nonjudgmental
Respects your choices
Useful for many goals

What it looks like in session

In an MI conversation, I ask open questions and listen closely. What would be different if this changed? What worries you about changing? What has worked before, even for a little while? I reflect back what I hear so you can hear it too.

I do not lecture or try to talk you into anything. People tend to dig in when they feel pushed. When they feel understood, they often find their own way to what they want.

Over time, the conversation usually moves from whether to change toward how. At that point, we can make a plan together, and I may bring in practical tools from CBT or solution-focused work to help you follow through.

The spirit behind the approach

MI is often described less as a set of techniques and more as a way of being with someone. It rests on partnership, acceptance, compassion and drawing out your own wisdom rather than installing someone else's.

In practice, that means I will not shame you for where you are, and I will not pretend to know your life better than you do. It also means I will be honest. If I notice a gap between what you say you value and what is happening, I may point it out gently so we can look at it together.

People often tell themselves they lack willpower. More often, they are caught between competing goals that both matter. MI helps you see those goals clearly so you can decide which one you want to lead with right now.

Change is rarely a straight line. If you slip back into an old pattern, we treat it as information rather than failure, and we use it to understand what support you need next.

Where I use MI

My background includes years leading addiction and clinical services in hospital and state systems, and MI is central to how I work with substance use. It is also useful with anyone standing at the edge of a decision: a career change, a relationship question, a health habit or a new chapter after a loss.

If you are not sure you want to change, you are still welcome here. Many people come to therapy exactly because they are unsure. We can take that uncertainty seriously instead of rushing past it.

If your concern involves heavy daily drinking, please talk with a physician before stopping suddenly. Alcohol withdrawal can be medically dangerous.

How it fits with the rest of my work

I rarely use one method alone. MI often opens the door, CBT helps us examine the thoughts that keep an old pattern going, and DBT skills can help when emotion runs high during change. I choose what fits you, and I explain why.

My style is warm and direct. I will be honest with you, and I will respect your right to decide what happens in your life.

Taking the first step

If you are weighing a change and keep going back and forth, that is a reasonable time to reach out. You do not need to have made a decision. Many people find it helpful simply to talk the question through with someone who is not invested in the outcome.

Sessions are by secure video for adults physically located in Connecticut, New York or Massachusetts. A free consultation gives you a chance to ask questions and see whether my approach fits. Visit the Work With Me page to request a time through the secure client portal.

Common Questions

Questions People Ask

Do I have to be ready to change before I start?

No. Motivational Interviewing is designed for people who feel unsure. We can explore both sides of the decision before you commit to anything.

Is Motivational Interviewing only for drinking or drug use?

No. It began there, but it is useful for many kinds of change, including work, health habits, relationships and major life decisions.

Will you tell me what to do?

No. I will ask questions, share observations and offer tools, but the decisions are yours. People usually make more lasting changes when the reasons are their own.